Where’s The Freakin Beach?

Our last day in the laid back town of Hoi An, Yvonne was determined to take auntie Kat to lunch, dinner or both.  My first inclination was to return to the restaurant Robbie Bell and I loved in 2013, Restaurant 328 but then thought to try something different.  My tailor in Saigon suggested “oh you must try Hoi An’s Cao Lau”. Well all the places we found that made that dish the best, all looked like local Street food places. We didn’t want to chance getting sick.  So Yvonne finds this AN BANG BEACH VILLAGE RESTAURANT.  She says, they have great reviews, rated #46 out of 714 restaurants here. Yvonne says, “ Yes Auntie, a nice lunch right at the beach”.  The first sign of “be careful” was the taxi driver needed the map on Yvonne’s phone to locate the damn place. Ok, so we are off. At a point, the  Driver had to get out his taxi and move a motorbike off the narrow road into someone’s yard and close their gate. Ok, we rollin again. We must have come the back way because there was not a sign in sight to indicate we were at a restaurant, just an arrow stating 10 meters.  I kept thinking, rated 46 out of 714?  But as we got out the taxi and proceeded down this dark outdoor passageway (and it’s daytime), I kept saying, “Yvonne you got us down here in the cut, I don’t know about this”. Yvonne:  Oh Auntie, it’s going to be fine”.  We are from Oaktown.  Me: Right, but I ain’t trying to see Oaktown over here”.

After walking the 10 meters, we enter this dimly lit place that looked nothing like the internet pictures.  In thought, mmm fake pictures, false advertising,etc. Yvonne still smiling and talking about “the adventure”.  The host was welcoming and seated us.  Okay fine, but then my ultra sensitive nose detected “another cat”  in the house, one with 4 legs not 2 but I didn’t see it.  There were 2 other tables that seemed to be enjoying themselves. The host immediately put on Bob Marleys “Legend” cd. I have to admit, that calmed me down a bit.  Yvonne still smiling and I’m trying like hell to show my appreciation but where is the beach we were suppose to dine adjacent to? The menu looked fantastic and we ordered a few things.  Yvonne started with the grilled scallops and she raved about them. I’m allergic so I can’t vouch. My fried spring rolls were good as was the deep fried whole snapper.  Then we shared the bbq prawns on a skewer of which the owner/server kindly removed the shells. Overall, the food was very good but where is the beach?  I won’t describe what I saw when I visited the ladies room. Still  Smdh

A German couple entered as we were leaving and told us the best way to get Uber was to go the opposite way out, said they love this place, they eat there every  night.  REALLY???????  Well, yeah they rent a room there.  Still Smdh about this adventure.  Oh no, the rain is beginning to fall as we made our way to a main road.  Uber showed 16 mins. FOR REAL????   Along came a green taxi, cancelled Uber and on our merry way to our safe, comfortable haven.

I was in for the evening, refused to go back out.  I needed to repack anyway.  Would you believe Yvonne decided to go to my original suggestion RESTAURANT 328. She and Lucille headed out later in the evening……bon appetit!

Heres another misadventure of Chauncey.   Chauncey was determined to get this leather jacket and boots custom made. Somehow she got turned around thinking she could take a shortcut back to the hotel. Her cell had died, no way to get Uber, finally got someone to call the hotel but all she could give was the intersection so the Hotel sent someone on on a bicycle looking for the only black woman with a long ponytail standing on the corner.  And yes, she made it safely back via bicycle and would pick up her lovely custom made leather goods the next day.

Today, we fly to Hanoi, an hour plus away  for more Kattrax adventures.

 

3 thoughts on “Where’s The Freakin Beach?

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